I have a theory about marriage and divorce-not the impulsive, never should have done that marriage instead the marriage where both are best friends and over time find they can’t make things work. Speaking from being divorced myself, all I can say is knowing the problem doesn’t always fix the situation. My theory is the missing ingredient. When you meet some one for the first time there is something both of you bring to the relationship and there are ingredients that each possess that make the relationship special. I equate the relationship with making an amazing cake for years and than over the years leaving out certain ingredients-the cake is still average but not amazing and over time it becomes a bland flavor that never satisfies. A marriage is much the same and that missing ingredient will one day change a wonderful relationship to a stale flavorless affair.

This post is not about marriage though nor baking a cake, this post is about business as the missing ingredient still applies. Starting a business is a beautiful thing, doing a service or creating a product that one is passionate about and allowing others to share in the success and passion of creating and selling that product or service. These days success and profit seem to be synonymous with greed and the evils of a capitalist society which I believe is quite sad and agenda driven but my post is not about politics its business; the good the bad and the ugly.

I miss the day of the small town merchant where everyone knows each other and goods and services can be bartered and conducted over a handshake and an IOU. I miss the days when a workers passion for a product or service amounted to a lifetime of loyalty and a company that returns the favor in assisting with the inevitable retirement of the employee. Instead, now a company uses up its employees as tools and squeezes all the passion and creativity out of them until the bottom line says the employees services are no longer cost effective. On the other side of the coin the dispassionate employee that takes advantage of a companies’ small favors and than expects that the employer owes them something. We have replaced honor and honesty with lawyers and contracts, the confidence in a pension with the instability of a 401k run by a stock market that is only interested in its own interests. No one can trust anyone, the company share holders are out to protect its shareholders, the employee is out the protect themselves and their family and the government is desperate to take as much from all of the above as it can. The bottom line has replaced common sense and loyalty, the small company that once could rely on its workers is now a hostage to its share holders, greed is a necessary evil to keep the entire network of people that all have their hands in the pot reaching for whatever is deserved or deemed deserved.

I think the problem is the fact that things get too big, too quickly and the common sense of keeping the margin down and the profits up leaves any hope for compassion or humanity as an unsustainable cost that must be managed. The small business becomes the organism that is comprised of its pieces, it can only feed itself to keep all of its pieces alive without any concern for any individual element. The competition of business motivates the company to get larger and larger and the small business is devoured until the cold unfeeling conglomerate is the only option and the small ma and pa business is not a sustainable luxury. Although honesty and integrity are beautiful things they can not compete with the bottom line which keeps the whole structure alive and although we all want these virtues to enjoy them risks losing that which we all need to live the lives we have forged which again seem too large and sustainable to support with the smaller profits and honesty of the small town business.

So what is this missing ingredient, through this whole process I have been trying to articulate in my mind and the obvious virtues of honesty, integrity and compassion are not the actual structure but more the beams that create something we have lost as our small towns turn into large cities; community. The community was the organism that could maintain its pieces and each piece gave back to the organism so the organism could keep its loyalty and compassion to its individual elements. The stock market, the corporate machine and all of the trappings of business have replaced the community, to keep this new community alive compassion and loyalty are unsustainable costs. Everything we gain we lose something and one of the most crucial products that allow people to be people is the community and I think we all need to find a way to resurrect this vital missing ingredient.

I have forgotten the last time I really took the time to enjoy a sunrise. This past weekend we camped at Lake Murray near Ardmore Oklahoma, right across from Tucker Tower as we usually do but this time there were so few people it seemed we had the lake and the campground to ourselves. I took a break from my self-induced change of eating habit and enjoyed the all american cuisine; the hotdog. My son grilled them and we did a taste test of two brands and we both agreed that mine was far superior and yet at the same time-your camping so it doesn’t really matter how good your dogs are-your camping so everything tastes better. I am partial to Nathans and Hebrew National-I’m just sayin.

We got to watch deer from across the lake and I wasn’t sure who was watching who-except for the fact that we had flash lights and they didn’t. The night was the perfect start to fall although the moon was so bright it felt like it was daylight all night. I actually slept even if the wind was gusting at  a ridiculous rate and we were wondering if the tent was going to fly off without us-it was pretty perfect all in all.

The next morning, I got to enjoy the sunrise, kayak for three hours and enjoy my sons sausage and eggs-my change of diet habits start again on Monday. After kayaking we went to a place that I have visited many times but I felt like I was seeing it for the first time, Tucker Tower. A long walk from the parking lot to the upper deck gave me quite a workout but by the time I got to the top I was ready for more. The gold, amber and red leaves were perfect complements to the deep blue green lake. I think I have only been up during the later winter months and never got the full beauty of the autumn foliage. My son had been up once before but it was so long ago it was all new to him. One interesting thing about the top of the tower-the overabundance of lady bugs and millipedes, we split our visit between looking at the amazing lake and checking out the busy lady bugs as they swarmed us.

 Our next stop was Turner Falls in Davis Oklahoma, another place I had visited many times before but for some reason it was particularly beautiful that afternoon and the light was at the perfect angle. I have painted the waterfall before and I have already started sketching a new one because the light and color were so amazing. I was already a bit  tired from climbing to the top of the tower and kayaking against the wind-did I mention the wind was still strong during the afternoon and directly in the opposite direction as we were kayaking. So I wasn’t planning on doing the hiking to the top of the falls, so instead we hiked over the falls and to the other side of the mountain, again by the time I was done I was ready for more exercise, nothing like adrenalin to give you lots of energy.

On the other side of the falls you can look over the river that feeds the falls and explore a second cave that I had never seen before. I had visited the falls many times and never had a chance to the see this side of the falls. The fall foliage was breathtaking against the mountains surrounding the river. I still am eager to explore the other miles of trails around the falls and feel like I had just discovered Turner Falls after so many years of just fishing for trout and taking pictures of the falls, there is a whole other area of this park I am eager to explore.

It was just a weekend but the fact that we did so much made it feel more like a full vacation. We got home early in the afternoon, tired but refreshed and ready for the week. I think it is not just what we choose to do on our vacations it’s how open we are to nuances and find new aspects of places we’ve been before.

California-Big Basin State Park Californias’ oldest state park and an amazing place so close to Redwood City

Our sixth trip is in the works, and we have finally decided where we will be going-Kentucky of all places. To recap, first we were on our way to Wisconsin with my brother and his family when my son came down with a fateful stomach bug, enter a father’s answer to a crisis. We planned and executed a trip down to the Texas Hill Country to see the caves-first stop Inner space caverns and all caves, waterfalls, zoos, rock collecting and other destinations to follow.

First lesson in a great vacation plan-be flexible, meet change and crisis with alternatives and possibilities and don’t be afraid to get out there. This first trip was a bit uncomfortable for me because I have a tendency to get sleepy at the wheel on long trips but it all worked out perfect-my confidence sparks the next idea and next years’ trip begins its preplanned stage. The best word or essence of this trip I could describe is freedom-the feeling that our world is out there and all we have to do is go find it, both of us were addicted to the road trip.

The next trip was a plan to take my son to the coast for a red fish trip, a hobby he had recently picked up-fishing. My initial idea was more the trip to the coast but it turned into a San Antonio/Rockport trip-the way to Rockport was a bit further than I had traveled before and again the nervous feeling of the long road did cross my mind-energy drinks bought and used as an emergency tool much like a tire iron and flares I guess. 

Fishing with Lanny Philips Rockport Texas

We went to San Antonio and he saw a pamphlet for ghost tours and the second lesson in our vacation process: the wild card-come up with an idea and don’t hesitate to say YES! In the next five minutes I was on the phone setting up a ghost tour for the evening. It is the diversity of our interests and the opportunity to do whatever comes up that makes our vacations so successful. Another lesson in vacationing-be open to new experiences and share interests that are common, this way no one is bored and no one feels slighted. When we are out on the road-there is nothing that is off limits.

Next lesson is to search for interests that are common and have the attitude that you will see everything you can-the road to the destination is the destination. A long ride to somewhere becomes  a bunch of short excursions to manageable trips. This lessens road fatigue and keeps the vacation unpredictable and exciting-you pretty much start the vacation the minute you get in the car.

The next trip was something I came up with as I had made some extra freelance money and was able to go out and purchase airplane tickets. Alcatraz here we come-we went to San Francisco and planned on caves, zoos and the pacific coast-my son had his first plane ride that he remembers and got acquainted with public transportation and the freedom of the rental car. Can I just say one of the best things he remembers is the food-we did not spare expense and I have since not missed one penny of what I spent.

Another lesson-don’t go broke on a vacation but don’t go halfway either-finding that balance is the hardest part. 

Another added interest on this trip was aquariums-Monterrey, Aquarium of the Bay-it was a great addition to our repertoire. This trip was I think, still our very best, we went from San Francisco to San Diego and back to Alcatraz-luckily we only stayed for an evening on the rock and the park system was nice enough to ferry us back to freedom. One outstanding element of this trip was as I mentioned-the food-Dungeness crab and Anchor steam beer for me. My recommendation would be the crab house on Pier 39. The best burger either of us have ever had was at Louis-another amazing restaurant I would highly recommend. In this trip my son who is quickly approaching his teens took the initiative to pick restaurants and hotels using his smartphone we recently invested in-he became a navigator, hotel reservations and arrangements for dinner and he did a really nice job of setting us up with great places to eat and navigating when we got off course. Another lesson in vacation-its both of your vacation and the more involved and interested your preteen is the more you both share the vacation and the excitement of the vacation-it’s not all about you!

How do you follow up a trip like our San Francisco/San Diego trip? Best thought I would give is don’t try-one does not compare to the other or you will quickly be disappointed. I decided that we would go somewhere I have been wanting to go for a long time-Mountain Home Arkansas and my main idea was to kayak and boat which the weather and chill in the air quickly changed-again be flexible and ready to change plans. Again we got to enjoy caves, amazing dinners and fishing for trout both with a guide and along the road-it wasn’t the California trip but it was amazing in its own way and both will remember all aspects fondly. 

Petit Jean State Park Arkansas

Our most recent trip was to Oklahoma-this was a wonderful trip but the least memorable probably and my explanation is that we brought our kayaks-this I believe limits your freedom to go see things and places and limits the trip to fewer options. We kayaked, camped, stayed in a cabin and stayed in the comfort of a hotel-all experiences were amazing including trout fishing and a trip to natural falls state park which we both enjoyed. We discovered the prettiest lake in Oklahoma-Ten Killer Lake and were able to fish where you can see the bottom of the lake in Broken Bow. We cooked salmon on the grill and watched bald eagles  fly across the immense sky-it was an amazing trip-probably on a scale of 1-10 a 9-the only difference with the other trips is that they all were twelves and thirteens-it’s all perspective.

Lake Murray State Park Oklahoma

Which brings me to my final lesson on the road trip-perspective-take everything as it comes, look for the challenges that bring wisdom and realize that the whole reason you are out there is to enjoy time together and feel the freedom of being open to all possibilities. Leave the phone and texting alone, talk about everything from nature, memory and everything in between. The trip, just as in life is what you make it, realize you’ll never get the money you spend back nor will you ever  miss it if you do it right. Go out there and gather memories much like the magnets you put on the fridge, every memory is a trinket that will never be anything less than priceless. Enjoy your freedom and realize its out there waiting to be explored so go explore. Next stop Kentucky, the Atlantic coast and everything between.

I have been absent for a while, not for the lack of desire to write, only for a lack of clarity. Life moves so quickly that we barely hang on to the rails never mind see where the journey is leading. In essence recently I gave in-allowing my higher authority to have its’ way with my life and direction-we humans have  a difficult time giving up the reigns I guess but I just decided to allow myself to stop being so in charge of my daily struggle. The result has been a bit of clarity but more importantly a feeling of joy that I have had a hard time fathoming lately, I would prefer there was something standing in the way of feeling joy but instead it was my own lack of awareness.

I walked again today and the realization of how much a child can see and enjoy the simplest things while the adult doesn’t have time to stop or smell anything occurred to me. Even if there was a rose around or the occasional garden to stroll through, when do we stop and listen to our environment. I am finding that every time I walk I end up realizing my surroundings and have a better understanding of life and more of a desire to write. The feeling would be like a person walking around with dark glasses and suddenly taking them off, the colors seem brighter, the surroundings clearer. Add all the other senses to that same awareness and the artist or writer feels as if they have just woken out of a dream.

I watched the cool gray colors of the lake, the silence of the empty field was extremely relaxing even if I was sweating from being very out of shape, okay my son would appreciate me admitting this fact. I could see the cars flying by on the bridge, the same bridge we had walked many time before, but now those cars almost seemed like a view from outside the treadmill. I took a break from everything, I listened to the birds and the breezes without listening to politics, the media or friends and family with their own distractions. I suddenly am aware of solitude, I can smell the cedar from a recently stained fence, notice pigeons high in the sky acting more like eagles than lowly pigeons.

My perspective changed, I have heard that exercise causes endorphins in the brain to rage, well I could feel those endorphins and it was pretty amazing. I also think a body or mind in motion tends to stay in motion. I think we too often dig ourselves into the politics of the day and the anger and frustration without realizing our lives are smaller and more intimate than the media would have us believe. We need to find joy in the simple things that we do and the happiness we lack is the byproduct of experiencing the simplicity of joy.

I have a friend that lives with a passion, she is a cook, an author, a creative and she lives her life like an artist uses a brush, I think I can see better into others’ lives than my own and realize how well or unwell others actions affect their own happiness-this realization has not only grown my admiration for a life well spent but intrigued me to live closer to the idea of being free to feel and experience my life, not as a long and boring repetitive sequel but a painting with many different colors and strokes for texture, each person that comes into my life will add the different hues and create a subject matter that I can be inspired by.

It’s amazing what a walk can do-brings us questions and makes those answers not only clearer but strikes up more questions for us to ask. This is the impetus to write and this is the purpose for clarity. I would love to know how my readers find clarity. Do you search for clarity in writing, philosophy, exercise-what is your process for allowing the muses to have their way with you?

A pond shot with my really cheap camera phone-just the idea more than a finished work

I can come up with every reason why I don’t walk, first of all it is so much of a minor exercise for my age and supposed condition-I should be working out and running-not true but it helps to excuse myself from walking. If I had a mountain or somewhere beautiful nearby, I would walk everyday-another excuse although partly true, I think if I were to live in the mountains or by the ocean the privilege to be able to explore would be hard to avoid and every time I have visited the desert I have not missed a chance to walk. I think one major issue that does keep me is the fact that you are out there, it almost feels strange to be walking alone without a steel cage to protect you from the dogs, thugs or anything else that seems to be threatening our city streets these days, there is no quick escape and no backing out once you are a mile away from your house.

I made the unfortunate mistake of getting my dog involved yesterday-the first day of my journey into getting in shape and losing weight. I think if I am on the lower level of being in shape, he is even lower on the path of getting fit. I was a mile away from my house and suddenly the dog started showing signs that it was too much, we were walking slowly but it wasn’t the pace it was the distance. He came home to a state of being warn out and I realize we will both have to work a bit slower to achieve our goals, he looked at me with disgust as I walked out the door and if he could talk I know he would have said, I got this, I can keep up. I chose to be safe and out I went alone-again it seems odd, at least with a dog you have someone that is keeping you company, without him it was just me and my thoughts-good news, bad news.

All morning I have had this urge to write or do something. My painting series is well on its way but I feel like I am stumbling a bit on some of the details. I have not had that creative shift where I get lost in the color and process. I tried writing and although a small amount of my horror stories trickled out and a bit of commentary on today’s politics, the flow came to an abrupt stop and I was off on my walk.

The first thing I noticed was how blue the sky is, it’s late September and autumn feels like it is near, that alone excites me. I walked by a small pond near my house and was happy to see a swarm of dragonflies, what is it about dragonflies that is so intriguing?  They are like fighter pilots much like swallows in the avian world. Their colors were amazing blues and greens that I could barely catch on canvas and their grace was just amazing. I saw various sizes and several different shades of blues and greens, I would have stopped and watched them but it was time to walk and I was eager to keep my promise to myself.

An amazing thing in the suburbs is that it is like a ghost town. I saw one family outside and a few pedestrians but other than this no one walking dogs or jogging-perhaps I was a bit late as most of that probably happens in the morning. I wound up near the lake and although I am positive chiggers will soon make themselves known it was a beautiful walk. Again dragonflies swarmed me along with question mark butterflies and the occasional sulphur. It felt more like spring with the buzzing of insects and the singing of birds. As I walked along the edge of the lake I could see turtles floating up to the surface and disappearing into the green as I approached. A huge egret flapped its wings and disappeared across the now pale blue sky. I saw a mother duck with her babies and as I approached the edge of the rocky jetty a great blue heron croaked as if I had annoyed it with my disturbance.

It is amazing how clear things become, there is nothing but you and the landscape around you, even if the landscape has  a bit more concrete than you would prefer nature does persist and while I am trying to get back in shape my creative side enjoyed the feeling of being surrounded in a semblance of nature. I will go further and further and who knows what I will find while my waist line shrinks so does my apprehension to the act of walking. I have photographed and added a study of dragonflies to my painting list and am excited for the possibilities of my next walk. I still miss the oceans and the mountains but by the time I get to see them I will be able to walk further and climb higher so it’s all good I guess. Thanks for listening and I hope you enjoyed the walk as much as I did.

Painting from a previous walk with my son-same place near Lake Ray Hubbard

Under painting+ of A restaurant balcony- a work in progress-

It has, in the past, been difficult starting painting when your first process is just under painting. Especially when there is a strong urge to create, the underlying image had always seemed like a slow walk when the creativity was desperate to run. I often want the immediacy of a product that looks more like a ghost of a finished product rather than the scribbles of a mad abstract artist. In recent times the under painting has actually become the backbone of the finished product, it is the stage hand that sets the atmosphere for the play, it is the building block to colors that form only in combination with the colors that show through from beneath.

If I am left cold on the initial image, chances are the finished product will not have the atmosphere or depth that I need it to have. I don’t paint pretty landscapes, not that there is anything wrong with that, I strive to paint moments in a place that happens to be a landscape. I hope that there are psychological undertones which I believe begin with the rough under layers. All objects, light and shadows form from the spine that is the under painting. All subtleties are created by how well the underlying scene appears and how the creative vision bends and twists the original rough image of that reality.

I almost think the psychology of the under painting is the sadness, the euphoria or the basic feeling of darkness and separation, these elements that perfect themselves in the original sketch and under painting. No one would have a clue of the finished product from the original sketch on canvas but the initial color and layout should explain, not necessarily in form but by atmosphere the painting and its undertones that will come together if everything works as it is supposed to. Another aspect that is often in the background is the music I am listening to which is directly related to my psychological state at the time. Much like my writing, there is usually a basic story that is happening and can be taken as lightly as a waterfall on a spring day but the feeling behind it is always there and that is the task I aim for the viewer, to feel something they may not know or recognize on first view.

If the under painting is the backbone, the details are the guts and the spirit is the feeling, the music that is captured without clarity. I hope to possibly haunt the viewer with whatever underlying feeling I have at the time the under painting is created. For other creatives, what does the under painting mean to you? Do you start with an under painting or go on directly to the finished work?

Beginning of the Terns-Florida coasal morning

Autumn begins, I mean really begins, in Texas of all  places. This weekend we had a cold front come in and suddenly I am in the creative mode somehow. In the far past, like twenty years ago, I used to write all year, photograph half the year and paint the rest of it, not specifically with intent, it just happened that way. I have not gotten back to photography in a while as my eye has somehow lost its purpose but I think it’s coming back slowly although it has taken years to get back.

Christine Lebrasseur photography

Christine Lebrasseur photography

I love the immediacy of the art form, yes I said it as I’ve seen much debate lately on what is art and what’s not. Recently, I have found a specific photographer that really embodies what I consider the art form  at its best-Christine Lebrasseur . I have often tried at points to capture something deep or interesting and often if the inspiration and eye is not on, you end up with something that is just cold but interesting but Christine captures portraits with that compelling and very interesting aspect of the face without trying to be deep or manufacture interest. I am actually planning on a separate review specific to her work so stay tuned. She captures a moment with her subject, an intimacy where the viewer is almost pulled out of their comfort zone. We can’t look away and yet we feel we’ve interrupted their space and can only be enthralled for a moment by what we learn from them. She celebrates the beauty, the ugliness, the light and dark of her subjects and they stand out from so many other photographs. The quality of the process, the position and honesty of her subjects and the personal journey into them which the viewer just can’t resist, that’s my take on her work and she has inspired me to not only pick up my camera but to see things from a different perspective without trying to see things from  a different perspective. I hope you all will check her work out and let me know what you think.https://plus.google.com/103667447824502944926/posts?cfem=1

I am in the process of getting back into the creative mode and recently have begun starting my next series of paintings, they are all large and seem to have a tighter feeling of space and light perfecting the end of the previous series. Maybe it is the feeling of Autumn coming, the change in temperature the closeness and availability of nature where previously in the Texas summer heat seemed distant and unapproachable. As only a fellow creative can appreciate, we go from dark to light, to feeling nothing to feeling everything and than there are those in between moments where the idea of creating something new becomes almost euphoric. I am excited about this series and the chance for seeing things differently both artistically and photographically.

For all other creatives-how do you describe that feeling of getting inspired to work. What season brings on the feeling and what is the process of turning it into finished work.

First of all, teens are teens, they are slowly breaking away from us and that is the truth and the way it is but there are moments when the parent and teen can transcend that feeling of being adversaries and lessons can be learned during the most interesting of times. The only reason I include this piece in the this life creatively is because how we deal and react with what happens often defines who we are and how we live our lives-be it creative, logical, aggravated, peaceful. There are many choices for us and how we live our lives and before I digress any further, I will explain.

I have had a shortage of peace in recent months, probably why my writing has been sparse, I am looking to feel that feeling that transcends understanding and lately I’ve just missed it. I feel often like my life is moving ridiculously fast and I am barely there for the ride, I am drifting with a violent tide that is promising to leave me a broken shell in the surf and I barely feel like I’m even there. So here is where the fish tank comes in-why would someone that is extremely busy and has a shortage of time and money decide to build a fish tank-it offers no logical theory-exit the logic, enter the creative.

My fourteen year old son finds an old thirty long tank in my studio and decides its time to start a fish tank, not only does he clean it out himself but he educates himself on the fish he wants to put in it. Here is another wonderful thing, it is an old passion I’ve had that I have stopped doing and now my fourteen year old not only wants to grow his interest but he wants me involved. We decide how much money it is going to cost and reluctantly I agree, the worth of us having another common activity that we both are passionate about seems like a no brainer and money well spent.

We set up the tank, pretty tank but it’s empty. Enter the helpful aquarium store person that tells us to start with a couple of fish, we reluctantly buy a couple of cichlids, stuff, more stuff and chemical kits to test the water, now my fourteen year old is even learning chemistry because it interests him not because he has to-another benefit. We are both learning more and more about the building of a tank and the fish that we can get for it. The conversation grows, both of our interest grows, my teen is enjoying a hobby and we are both igniting a passion for a childhood interest that I sadly grew out of. He was very stressed as the levels were high and attachment to the couple of fish where making us both feel a bit guilty about introducing them early, lesson learned-fishless cycles are great-patience is a virtue and impulse buys are over rated.

It has taken literally a month of waiting for the cycles to get where they’re supposed to be and this weekend we were finally going to put in fish. It’s probably the cheapest part of our purchase and after exploring for weeks several pet shops in the area, another old passion of mine-we decide to buy our fish at The Fish Gallery, a very amazing place for any aquarium enthusiast to visit. We bought four fish from there and another two fish at the local Petsmart, we got exactly what we wanted and both were excited about finally getting the tank done.

We enjoyed them for a good fifteen minutes, the fish seemed to love the home we made for them, including the holy rock and the plastic plants. They are adapting well with each other and I am excited about a nice nap and being able to paint and relax for the rest of the day. Five minute nap and those words a homeowner never wants to hear-we got a problem.

He comes running out just as my eyes close-we got a problem-the tank is flowing water out over the dresser and onto the rug, we are sunk. We cover the bottom of the tank with towels and decide to buy a new tank-I was easy and calm about the whole affair as we had both talked about our next endeavor being a 100 gallon tank for our living room. We go to the Pet Smart and buy a 55 gallon tank-why bigger you ask-because bigger is better and why not? We earned a bit better of a tank with all the stress, so we bring home a new tank and more sand and we tear down the old tank. Our first step is to stop the panic of the leaking, so we calmly got the fish to safety, eliminated the problem of the leaking tank, we were set to rebuild the tank. It went much quicker than I even imagined and before long, the new tank was on a dresser and we were adjusting the rock again. Unfortunately the tank was too close to the wall which didn’t allow us to put our larger filter in and more importantly, what we thought was a solid dresser was a sagging mess and the tank was taking its toll on the wood.

We drove to the store looking for a solution, I decided right than, a real stand that we can get to finish the job-our patient fish are in a small jug of water and we are both nervous about them dying from the stress. Our first objective-get the water out of the tank-we bought seven five gallon buckets to help with this process-if anyone needs a gently used bucket-well we cleared out the first tank as I had visions of it collapsing by the time we go the stand erected. Both of us learned much about reading instructions as a son and dad usually do when putting something like this together, quickly and with a bit of exhaustion already a factor. We got the stand together and moved the tank-all that careful planning and water adjustments seemed pointless and overdone at this point as we had a murky disheveled tank with PH and nitrites probably all over the place-there was nothing we could do but hope for the best, after hours of fish in a barrel-they are not as fun as monkeys but I digress, the fish lived and at 2 in the morning we turned the lights on to a tank that looked like the thickest fog you’ve ever seen.

This morning-I woke up to a tank that was still recovering but the fish lived and the clarity was improving. I realized something though, with all the exhaustion and stress, I somehow found peace, my son and I both never lost our tempers or snapped at each other, we both taught each other lessons during the whole ordeal and while my expenses were bleeding out I found peace despite the circumstances. We both woke this morning to success and a beautiful tank out of the chaos of the evening before but I realized for that whole time, I was there, I was present, both mentally and physically-we both handled the situation, it didn’t handle us and through the great stress and trying circumstance I found peace, a feeling of accomplishment and a relationship-building circumstance I could not have bargained for. God works in strange ways and often directly to the opposite of what we think should be-it’s how we act and how we handle the daily struggles that finds peace in a stressful place.

Now it’s your turn-family projects?? What have you learned from hobbies with your teens? What was the worst family vacation you ever had? What did you learn from these experiences-did you meet it with logic? Creativity? Aggravation?

Most Recent Portrait

I have been working on Paint Rowlett Plein Air contest and than an image for a gala at the Warwick Melrose Hotel last night-it was a fashion/music/art gathering. As previously mentioned in a prior post-I stepped out of my comfort zone and completed the second portrait of my career. I actually loved the experience because it forced me to pay more attention to details and because the scope of what looked good was greatly reduced as a portrait doesn’t allow a wide latitude of realism.

First Portrait of Son

Another thing I learned is that I love to work with gold leaf-it was something I thought of as a way to heighten the texture of the Russian ttheatre-the name of the painting is a night at the opera. The gold leaf connected details and made the texture of the background become more finished and full of depth. I will definitely incorporate it in the future, including a painting I sketched three Christmas eves ago, it is an image of a rainy evening with people in blues and purples holding umbrellas outside a church, inside the light is warm and red in the decorations for the season and the gold leaf will heighten the intensity of the light inside. This image will be in the new series which although I have digressed, that is what this post is about.

I have finally finished other projects and can now devote my time to the new series. An exciting aspect is the fact that I am coming full circle painting larger canvases, something I used to do more when I was much younger. Just today I have underpainted four paintings and got back to a large canvas of the coast of Florida. I have much better focus in mind, I feel I am closer than I have ever been to the work I am doing probably because these images are all within the last few months instead of years. It is the closest thing to working Plein Air-you capture the image in your mind and than go home to paint while the image is still fresh, with photographs and sketches to support the details necessary to complete  the painting.

Source for Painting-the Forgotten Coast

I have sketched out seven paintings of the Florida coast-specifically, the forgotten coast of the panhandle of Florida. The paintings are all very large-at least thirty inches or so and the light and dark are dramatic. I want the viewer to look out of the darkness into the beauty of the ocean-one painting is a restaurant in afternoon where people are having lunch-you see the ocean but it is framed by the darkness looking out from a dark room, where people are eating. Another image is a storm coming in while terns suspend in the light around you. I have also gone back to an image of San Francisco with people spending the day at the beach. I believe it will be a very varied series with many aspects of water and the evening sky. Two images that I am very excited about but are a bit from the past is a painting of the fountains at the harbor in Rowlett at night with the lights shining through the water and a painting of fish at the surface of the water as I am forty feet down looking up at the moon-again this one is from a long time ago but I’m hoping to capture an amazing deep blue and a surreal feeling of being suspended in the darkness of Shark River Inlet in Belmar New Jersey.

I am really excited about this series and I feel like it perfect where the previous series left off. I finally have a great focus on the finished product and with the new skills I have recently adopted am excited about new paintings. Please stay tuned.